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after spoken, it is too late to take them back – the
damage is done. Another problem with anger is that the word “divorce” can
easily be thrown around. You may not mean it, but you know it hurts, thus
making you the winner of the argument. NEVER talk about divorce in your
relationship, even if just teasing. If you need to go to another room to cool
off, and then do that, but whatever you do, do not allow your anger to take
control of your relationship. 45.
Financial
Woes One of the main reasons other than fidelity that
marriages fall apart is due to finances. When couples are struggling with money
problems, tempers flare, frustration builds, drinking may start, and it is an
all-around unhealthy situation. The minute there are any signs of financial difficulties,
the two of you need to immediately sit down and figure out a plan on how to
deal with the problem. If needed, go to see a financial consultant or a credit
counseling service to help you get back on track. Do not allow your finances to
get out of line or your relationship will certainly suffer. 46.
I
Forgive You If something has happened in your relationship
causing the trust to waiver, you will have many things to work through. When
your mate has done something that requires you to forgive, you have to forgive,
REALLY forgive. Once you have worked through the issue either together or with
professional counseling, and you tell them that you forgive them, you can never
hold that over them again. As an example, if your mate has had an affair and
the two of you choose to work it out rather than throw the relationship away,
once the problems are resolved and the forgiveness is said, it is done! This
means that you cannot stalk your mate to ensure they are where they said they
would be, call or page them throughout the day, constantly ask for
reaffirmation of your relationship, it means that you forgive and put the past
behind you and then move on in a new, strong, and healthy relationship. It will
not be easy, but you can do it with the right help, attitude, and commitment. 47.
Fighting
No-No While having disagreements is normal and sometimes when controlled, healthy for relationships, the place and degree of discussion are important. Keep your disagreements private. Being at a party or anywhere around family or friends and breaking into an argument is a great way to break down a relationship. Not only does it cause embarrassment for your mate, but it also puts a negative light on both of you from the people witnessing the fight. If you are in public and think you need to argue, at least find a
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