|
was all over.
In every case the one thing which had held them together so long was
fear of disgrace. "Oh, what will people think of me?" - is
the first cry of everybody - especially women. It was that which made the
deserted one unhappy and resentful. It is that which makes many
women pose as injured innocents and rate the deserter as a villain. And
all the time in secret they are glad, glad that they are relieved
of the burden of living with an uncongenial husband or wife. Of course
there are other reasons why women hate to be left by their husbands. One
is that their support is apt to go with the deserter. Public opinion
keeps many a family in the same house years after it really knows
it is separated widely as the poles. The dread of
having to take care of herself keeps many a woman hanging like grim
death to a man she knows she does not love, and who despises her. The fear of
public opinion and the love, not of money, but of ease, holds together
under one roof tens of thousands of families who have been occultly
and really separated for years. A man is held
by the same sentimental notion that M.T.C. Wing has - that he must
"protect" the woman. So he stays in hell to do it. He has to stay in hell
until she gets out. In almost
every one of these separation cases it is the woman and not the man, who
gives the signal. In George D. Herron's case the wife offered to
take a certain sum of money and release him from supporting her. He met
her conditions - and bore all the odium like a man. To her credit be it
said she did not pose as an injured woman. I know nothing about Elbert
Hubbard's case, but I venture to say that if he and his wife are
separated that she was the one who did the leaving act. We hear a lot
about the "Biblical reason" for divorce; but I say unto you that
infidelity is no reason at all for divorce. The one just cause for separation
is incompatibility of temper. A man is an
Individual; a woman is another Individual; and neither can make himself
or herself over to please the other. When two
people from lack of similar ideals and aims cannot pull together the
quicker they pull apart the better it will be for them - and the
children, too. I know well a
couple who lived together long enough to have grown children. For
nearly a score of years they pulled like a pair of balky
|