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kind of recovery therapy that only you
can apply and control - the results are up to you. Chapter 6 “How to Rebuild Your Life After A Divorce” Suddenly you're single
after years of marriage. This always results in a serious blow to the old ego
of at least one of the persons involved. It's a traumatic experience - a time
that's very difficult to live through - and a feeling that isn't easy to
recover from - yet life does and must go on. When divorce occurs, and
you feel as though your life has been shattered, the first thing you should do
is start leading the life of a single person immediately! You should force
yourself to make a date at least once a week. Start noticing other people, join
in the activities of the singles crowd, and get back into the swing of things. Indeed, the sooner you
start dating, even if it's only dinner with someone you work with, sooner the
pain will subside. Basically, you should just
go out and not concern yourself with the "yes or no" possibilities of
a sexual encounter. It's most important
however that you don't expect too much of yourself too soon. Generally it takes
about two years for the victim of a divorce to get over the hurt and for most
of the scars to heal. Anyone thinking or believing they're ready for any kind
of permanent relationship in less time, is probably living in a world of make
believe and heading for a repeat of past mistakes. Transitional Relationships As a newly divorced
person, you'll probably experience several "transitional
relationships." These are also a necessary part of your healing process,
and though you may think you care a great deal about them at the time, it's
best that you remember these are only temporary encounters with transitional
partners. You needn't feel guilty about breaking off one of these relationships
because you may very well be someone's transitional partner later on in your
life. Your best opportunities for meeting new friends and possible marriage partners are within the normal course of business and social events. It's also generally within your best interests to join in the activities of a local Singles Organization such as Parents Without Partners or Singles International. Then too, you should
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