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If you were able to develop
other strategies and to think of other ways that Tony and Tina could express
their hurt and disappointment, you are on the proper path. You will be happy to know
that Tony and Tina did get their marriage back on track. Tina tried again to talk to Tony after he came home
and both agreed that they were very unhappy, and that things could not go on as
they were. Tony suggested divorce, and they did separate for a while,
but neither of them really WANTED a divorce. So, they decided to give it another try. Tina moved back into the house from her mother’s home
and she asked her mother to be supportive of her marriage and not to criticize
and insult Tony or Tina’s choice of a husband. Tony sat down with Tina and drew up a budget so that
they both knew how much money they had to spend. And he got better at communicating – telling her when
things changed in the schedule and asking how she felt about what was going on
instead of just assuming it was his right to do whatever he wanted. Tina had some trouble when she tried to avoid
attacking Tony, because she felt very hurt at what he had done in the past and
wanted him to ‘pay for his behavior’. And, Tony had to learn to listen and not assume what
Tina was feeling or thinking. But, eventually, they got it right. Today, they have two children and a happy, healthy
marriage. So, you see? Even marriages that may seem hopeless can be
saved if both partners really want the marriage to work. Don’t be discouraged! Talk to your spouse today
and share your hopes and dreams for what your marriage can be. Tell them what you’ve
learned in this book and start to use these methods and techniques today. Within weeks you are likely
to see improvement. But, don’t stop
there. Keep going to make your marriage
as solid as possible, keep the commitment alive and stay focused. As Kennett said “You will
never know just how good your marriage can be if you don’t try to improve your
relationship. What I learned about my
wife AND myself during this process has made me a better person and it has made
my marriage better than I ever dreamed it could be!”
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