So You Think You Have Problems?You might find it surprising
to know that over the past thirty years, the number of Americans who say they
would like to be married is well over 90%.
That much has not changed. 75% of Americans still say
that marriage should be a life-long commitment that should not be abandoned,
except under the direst of circumstances.
And even AFTER a bad
experience with divorce or separation, more than 80% of those surveyed thought
that marriage should be for life. What do you think? The average unhappy marriage
looks something like this: Ø
Young adults Ø
Employed, but
lower income Ø
Children in the
household But, that is not
to say that unhappily married couples do not come in all shapes, sizes, age
groups and income levels. Studies HAVE illustrated
that marriages ending in divorce experienced more fighting, more conflict, an
environment of stress and unhappiness and, twice the rate of spousal abuse and
violence. But, spousal abuse and violence was reported
in only 20% of these cases, and only in 10% of unhappy marriages where the
couple decided to stay together. So if the UNHAPPIEST people – the ones who endure the most conflict,
fighting and environmental stress – are the ones that decide to seek a divorce,
then it should hold true that after the divorce, these people would be happier
and more balanced. Studies show that those unhappily married
people who decided on divorce were no happier or emotionally well balanced
after the divorce than they were during the marriage! In
other words, divorce did not solve all of their problems!
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